About Dating (With Girls and in reverse)

 

Hi all!

I know this is not the best time for such topics, but for a very long time I wanted to talk about sore.

For the past five and a half years, I have been trying to find a girlfriend. I am still alone for various reasons. As they say, the coin has two sides, and some reasons lie in me, in my mistakes, and others in women and their decisions not to build any relationships with me.

I'll start with myself. From time to time, I still have speech blocks due to the fact that during a conversation I start thinking about extraneous things, which leads to a speech block (*details in my video about stuttering and its causes). Further, I still have symptoms of maladaptive daydreaming. One of its results can be a tense facial expression, as a result of which the surrounding people, out of ignorance, can draw incorrect conclusions about a person. For example, villains in the movies often have such facial expressions, but in reality, a person with such facial expressions may not have any bad intentions and thoughts. The remnants of the shyness that once enveloped me also cannot help but affect how I might look in the eyes of other people during a conversation. Of course, I should be focused on what is happening in the present time, and not on my inner thoughts when I walk, but such is the power of habit. And one of the reasons that I still have these problems is that sometimes I would worry more than necessary about the fact that no one wants to get to know me - emotions that also affect the appearance and behavior of a person. It may seem like an eternal wheel, but of course the solution lies in living present-focused whenever it’s necessary. I know this, I know how to overcome all these problems - which can ideally take seconds - and I try to fix the habit of being focused on reality... but, different situations in life often cause me to go back to my reflections... the current situation in the country (* "special operation" and its catastrophic consequences) is one of them - you must admit, it is very difficult not to imagine at least a little what could happen to you in the future.

I should make it clear that during conversations with girls, for the most part, I spoke without speech stutters, and therefore my mind was focused on reality. But even small manifestations of incorrect thinking, namely, focusing attention on your inner world (* reflections, fantasies, memories) that is unjustified by the situation, and not on the reality around you, show themselves both in facial expressions and in body language.

Another reason may be general physical appearance. Maybe the girls see something in me that they don't like.

And the final reason is my experience with Thiaoouba and my knowledge that I have gained from that experience. Unfortunately, skepticism has reached a very high point in Russia, especially in Moscow - in a city where people think more about money and material things, and not about their mental and spiritual development (*I understood this from personal communication with different girls in Moscow, as well as from texting). I had thoughts of trying to look for a mate in another city, but due to life circumstances, this is not possible to do for the time being.

Now let's move on to the other side of the coin. To the girls. I must say right away that I never learned telepathy and cannot 100% know the real reasons for the refusal by those few girls who agreed to talk to me. In fact, everything I wrote about earlier is also my guesses - but I am more than 90% sure that they are correct.

One of the things that struck me is that not a single girl wanted to have a second date. The only exception is a swindler and a girl who had a boyfriend and so we just got to know about each other as friends. And this despite the fact that with many I spoke for a maximum of 30-60 minutes. During this time, it is impossible to draw any normal conclusions about a person.

The fact is that I can learn from my mistakes. And this is confirmed by the fact that on the second date with the future swindler, I was almost a different person. I had almost no speech stutters, and I was just a bit shy. If it hadn’t become clear that that girl just wanted to eat at someone else’s expense, then on a hypothetical third date, I would most likely be even more confident. This is one of the things about me - I need some time to "bloom", so to speak. This leads to the following advice, which is directed to people of both sexes:

Give people a chance to open up. It is absolutely normal to be a little nervous when you first meet - especially when women agree to talk to you at best a couple of times a year. Then, on different days, people can have different moods, well-being, and so on. It is very easy to come to the wrong conclusions about a person if you build an opinion about him only from the short time that you spent together.

Meet the person at least three times and spend at least a few hours with them talking and getting to know each other's interests and views on life.

Also remember that people are able to change if they can see their mistake, as well as the benefit they’ll receive by changing. If you don't like something about a possible future partner, tell her or him about it. Find out his point of view and, if you think that his position is wrong, ask if he is ready to rethink it and get rid of his shortcomings (*these can be bad habits, beliefs, etc.) - do not put an end to the person immediately, as soon as you see in him something that you do not like or contrary to your beliefs. By the way, in my opinion, this is one of the features of strong marriage ties - when people help each other in difficulties and hardships, instead of starting to cheat or getting a divorce when something starts to go not according to their desires and plans.

If you are familiar with my content, then you should understand that most likely I will not beat someone, yell, swear, etc. Moreover, I have learned a few important things about life and I will be ready to help my other half. I already help people with my free books and videos.

This brings us to the following. All the girls who agreed to talk to me had some shortcomings. Simply put, they weren't perfect - and that's normal for a Category 1 planet. As for me, I was ready to accept them for what they were; and I was ready to help them with their problems. But, as you understand, I did not get the same from them. This is their right, of course, but it is also, I believe, a mistake in terms of the Law of the Universe. They think they will find someone better (*in their opinion), but will they? One such acquaintance of mine wrote me this - she wrote, in fact, why should she wait until a person brings his thoughts in order when she can find someone else now? She was single for at least a year when she wrote me that... I hope you can see the difference between a year and a now. Then they do not know anything about life and the Universe. They think that everything happens by chance, and not as a consequence of their own decisions - we pay with suffering for mistakes, and we get benefit, well-being for the right decisions (*details in the video about mistakes and in the book Thiaoouba: The Golden Planet). But there’s a time for everything, sometimes retribution does not come immediately.

I remember a story when a guy deceived a girl by telling her a verse from the Internet, which he passed off as his own, in order to appear to be whom he was not, and when the girl found out the truth, having discovered that site and the verse, she already loved the guy and forgave him. This story shows the correctness of my conclusions - if you do not devote too much time to the shortcomings of a person, then perhaps you can start loving him for who he is; and then if you pay attention only to the appearances, you could intertwine your fate with a liar, who is a completely different person in reality.

I myself, for the most part, no longer have problems telling the truth about myself. And I think openness and honesty are very important in a healthy relationship. People should not be afraid to speak the truth. Understatement will only lead to misunderstanding and wrong conclusions.

There was a time when I was 19 years old and chatted with Yulia on ICQ. We could talk about everything and the conversation did not subside. That’s how people should communicate. How else can you get to know a person if you don’t communicate normally? Many girls expect jokes and witty comments from a guy. But I think that you first need to understand if you are on the same wavelength - and for this you still need to communicate well and ask questions that are important to you (*this is important for spiritual kinship and achieving Palantius relaxation). Then people can entertain each other. Otherwise, it's just some kind of clownery when a person supposedly has to entertain another person whom he does not even know.

Perhaps it’s the reason many marriages fail. Surely those people also fell for the impressions - perhaps even from the "fairy tales" read on pick-up forums - and then, with the passage of time, it turned out that there was little in common between the couple and almost no similar interests. This would not have happened if people had initially found out how similar they are - and for this you need to have conversations - to ask questions on important topics.

If you say - but they lied to me! - I will advise you to watch my videos about Auras and telepathy. Both things will help to know whether a person is honest or not.

Further, girls can also approach guys to meet them, provided that they behave in the same way as if a guy came up to them and they agreed to get acquainted. There is absolutely nothing immoral and bad in this if you do not have a bunch of psychological problems (*when you evaluate the situation based on your beliefs, and not with the help of logic and common sense). Think about it, what difference does it make who is the first to get acquainted if further acquaintance will take place along the same path? Naturally, I am talking here about the acquaintance that I spoke about earlier, when people first try to get to know each other, and only then have a love relationship with all the ensuing consequences. If a girl comes up to get acquainted and offers to have sex in a couple of minutes, then she is immoral because she offers sex to a barely familiar person, and not because she came up first to get acquainted.

I think that this should be obvious, but, somehow, we still have such ridiculous stereotypes.

Here we can briefly mention that sex and the desire to have sex are absolutely normal. Watch my videos on this topic to learn more (*information from the book Thiaoouba: The Golden Planet). Again - it's only okay if people are in a relationship, love each other - ideally have a spiritual relationship - and are ready to live together and have children in case of pregnancy.

Further. I consider absurd the opinions that a person who initiates an acquaintance should also conduct that acquaintance. If you agreed to get acquainted, it simply means that both of you are free and do not mind finding your other second half. To understand if your interlocutor can become one, you need to get to know him, so you’ll have to speak to him.

If people agreed to get acquainted, then acquaintance and development of relations should take place on equal terms, where both partners make their contribution to kindling the relationship.

Thus, if the guy was the first to approach the girl, then the girl at any time into the relationship can calmly offer to go to the cinema herself, for example, and there is nothing criminal in this.

Usually, I tried to meet women on the street, in parks, for example, but last winter I decided to try VK.com and some specialized dating sites and apps. Out of ignorance, I naively thought that here it would be at least easier to find someone to talk to, and then we could meet somewhere in the city, take a walk and, hopefully, get to like each other. Reality was different. I tried to write all sorts of things to all sorts of girls, but all to no avail. I must have written to a few hundred people and only a couple of girls wrote me back. One lives in another city, and the other already had a boyfriend, but she confirmed some of my guesses regarding one of the reasons for my complete failure at online dating. She had a “Morons” section on her page, where she collected screenshots of guys who offered her, to put it very mildly, sex in the first... well, sometimes in the second message. Reading the screenshots, I confirmed my hunch of what the girls have to go through. What I did not expect was when that girl wrote to me that such messages can come almost every day.

By the way, this also applies to dating in the real life. I once did a survey on a woman.ru forum and more than 50% of people voted they thought that when people approach them on the street, the goal is sex, not human relationships. Naturally, human relationships also involve sex.

Here it’s worth making an appeal to such guys and asking them to stop littering their heads with nonsense from pick-up sites, and start treating girls like living people, and not like soulless material things that you can use until you get bored, and then “make an upgrade”, just like you change your old phone for a new one. When you write to girls, and not only, such things, you make things worse for yourself and other people. This certainly does not help the society to become united and ready to help out those who are in trouble.

In fairness, I’ll say that I myself am not 100% perfect in this regard, and the girls are too. There was a funny case when I politely wrote to one woman asking if it is possible to get to know her, in case she’s single - to which she blocked me without a single word. Going to my old fake account, I wrote her a question if it is possible to meet her for sex. Surprisingly, not only did she not block that account to this day, she also spent her time and energy to write to me, saying she does not have sex. My answer was, me too.

It's not about putting someone (*girls in our case) on a pedestal, it's about a balanced relationship where you don't go to one of the extremes when having conversations with girls - i.e., treat them as equals, not as soulless things in one extreme, or like a princess in the other.

As I said earlier, I understand that the coin has two sides, and it can be me too - and it is when I get lost in my inner world. But what about Thiaoouba and my knowledge, which I have to share with others, since that experience takes a huge place in my life? Sometimes I was visited by questions, what if I'm wrong somewhere? Well, after the start of the so-called special operation in Ukraine (* which, of course, I do not support. All issues could have been calmly resolved peacefully, through negotiations. And other issues were completely an internal matter of the Ukrainian society, in which no one from the outside has the right to interfere), and, in particular, after the so-called partial mobilization, I realized that in this matter I’m not mistaken. After all, a lot of people have supported that, in the result of which many people actually died, many others became disabled, many were left homeless. When people support this, everything becomes clear. It is not surprising that my ideas of a harmonious, spiritual and free life were ignored (*and we, the people, could have the complete power when special operations and mobilizations against the free will of man would be unthinkable. See my Manifesto for details; reading Thiaoouba will also help). So, the reason, by and large, is in people with little to none spiritual understandings, among which I have to exist, and not in me.

Perhaps not all my thoughts will be clear to you. Consequence of little experience of communication with people on one hand; English not being my native language on another. The first one is also the cause of my loneliness, and yet it is also impossible to learn to speak if few people want to speak with you. By the way, I tried asking several girls if it was possible to keep them company and just talk about something. As you understand, everyone refused even such a simple thing.

If you are interested, I tried just asking people questions, or just saying something to start a conversation. The result is almost non-existent.

There is another reason for my loneliness. Again, this is my opinion. I started looking for a girlfriend way too late. I needed to start doing this at 18, not at 28. Back then, many girls still were single, which would make dating and conversations easier. Now all adequate women are already married and with children, while others have boyfriends. Those who are still single in their 30s often have certain problems that prevent them from building relationships. But I will talk about this in another video.

And finally... I don't really want to end on a dark note, but then the intentions of the following words are actually quite bright. Mass shootings and other crimes have their origins in the rejection of the person by society - alas, I know this from my own experience. So, for example, while reading Elliot Roger’s book, I found many similarities between us. I know what he went through emotionally and I know how hard it is. Luckily for me and some other people, I have my experience with Thao, which proves the truth of Thiaoouba: The Golden Planet. This is one of the main reasons why I was able to curb my strongest negative and violent emotions caused by some members of this society. And most likely I will not follow the path of Eliot, for example; I know that I would have to pay with suffering again for mistakes - that is, I would find myself in the same place where I have already been in this life - or even in a worse situation. That does not make sense. We, people, live to develop spiritually, not to degrade.
But not everyone knows this yet, which is why we have many modern problems. Yet life could be completely different if people just extended a helping hand to those who need it.

Thank you all and have a nice day!